Hareline

Upcoming Events

Mooloo's 800th, Te Kauri Lodge, Kawhia, 21-23 Mar 2003 [Rego form doc pdf]
Kids' Weetbix Triathlon, Hutt Rec., 30 March 2003. Talk to Oggy if you can help marshalling
Norwest H3 800th & AGM, Auckland, 05 Apr 2003
Aussie Nash Hash 2003, Kalgoorlie, WA, 18-20 Apr 2003 [http://www.hashgods.com/]
Nelson H3 555, St Arnaud, 04-06 Jul 2003
Mt Maunganui H3 777, Otawa Lodge, Te Puke, 25-27 Jul 2003
9th Pan Asia Hash 2003, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, 03-05 Oct 2003
Interhash 2004, Cardiff, Wales, UK, 23-25 Jul 2004

Run Reports

Run 1435

On arriving at BLACK GOLDFISH's wee home in Days Bay, it was disturbing to discover that the trail could go up (followed by down), or it could go down (followed by back up). It could not be flat. This induced in some of us a debate about heading off to the Cobar for a few cold ones, but nope, we toughed it out.

A wee loop through the bushes behind BLACK GOLDFISH's place led to the pack emerging from the bush a few metres up the road. The trail then headed south to the end of Kotari Rd where there was a check with the options to go up the summit track, across the back of the park, or down a zig zag to sea level. After checking up trail was discovered going down. PUHA took pleasure calling 'on left, on right, on left .etc' - got quite annoying really. Though it was a good demonstration of the tacking and gibing skills that led to the Europeans winning the Yankee Cup. His attempts at shortcuts across some of the zigs reminded me of the pathetic Team NZ though.

The trail then went north along the bottom of the hill until it inevitably started winding its way up some road. And up. And up. The monotony was broken when we left road and entered a pine forest. But the trail kept heading up. And up. And up. SOURPUSS was bleating on about how he used to run up these hills and now all he could do was struggle up them at the same pace as the rest of us - happens to us all eventually. Finally with sore calf muscles we reached the ridge track. A brief check and the trail was found heading south. A few jogs interspersed with walks led to an arrow pointing down the Wainui side of the hill - I don't think so. According to PUHA there was a check down there. However the smart ones amongst us (ie not PUHA) headed straight down the Eastbourne side, to eventually come across trail. This trail went down. And down. And down. We came out at on Kotari road at the first check, and gently jogged back to the on-on. Some could hear OGGY calling down the zig zag - his inspirational shortcutting meant he missed this bit at the beginning of the run and as a result got in after most of the pack.

The beer was flowing freely at the On-On, with everyone resolved to try and kill the keg before GHASTLY NASALBUM got in. MODESS JOE tried to fool us into thinking he had gone to Wainui for fish and chips. TC showed his concern by trying to bully others into searching for him (he would supervise from beside the Keg) but there was a general feeling of 'ah fuck him'. Just as well we stuck with our natural instincts as GHASTLY NASALBUM eventually appeared just in time to receive the TRIPOD AWARD. Various other down downs were awarded, including SOURPUSS for mentioning the word Police, TRIPOD for something - probably HIGH HEELS getting prissy again, THE GENERAL and BUBBLES for wearing womens lycra pants (THE GENERAL's were rather wet at the back - possibly sweat), and NUMBNUTS got a down down because KNOB ROY wasn't there.

The POW went to me. The reason being by next week I will be a kept man, under the thumb of the young lady shifting from Tauranga and me not being allowed to sleep in the bed and have sex on Monday nights or something. HIGH HEELS is totally wrong though - the bed is mine and so she can sleep on the couch and she finds me irresistible anyway and so wouldn't ever kick me out anyway. Such optimistic innocence huh? Anyway that's enough crap from me. Oh yes, and we killed the keg.

On ON

Sproggy

Run 1436

St Patricks Day Run

We should have known from early on that this was to be an 'Irish' night to be sure, to be sure. There was definately something Irish about this run from the outset, when the intrepid hashers who were instructed to look for a 'red barn' could have been forgiven for driving past the On-On that looked suspiciously like a brown shearing shed.

Stranger things were afoot with the flour trail set in a delicate shade of pink. This may have had something to do with the appearance of a few 'lady' hashers, but little to do with showing us the trail!

Having marched us up to the top of the biggest hill, and the On-On visible down in yon valley, it was indeed Irish thinking that the pack would do anything other than go straight back down again. The promise of a Piss-Stop was not enough, for the first time I can recall, to lure any of the 'runners' in the opposite direction. This in itself was indeed a rare occasion, made even more remarkable by the return of the Piss that some (who will remain nameless because I've forgotten who they were) walkers were incapable of polishing off.

With the luck of the Irish and the nearest thing to a full moon to help us all return from what was, for me, a prick of a run, hence I get to write this, but more about that later.

Several notable Down-Downs ensued :-
Teapot for only reaching 600 runs.
Paddy Passports appearance earned him a full-moon cocktail.
Puha for being 'Swiss', and late for the bus.
Bubbles for something inconsiderate.
General for a crap trail.
Gnash for suggesting we 'shit-hot' this run.
River Rat for something.
Me (Knob Roy) for nothing.
Sproggy for bringing Porthole along.
Muted Pig got new-booted.
Viskis for argueing with Oggy's towbar.
POW to me (Knob Roy) because Numbnuts got Down-Downed in my absence last week.

Having the POW bestowed on oneself was then followed by the most unusual event of the night. This was being told that there is 'a rule', yes fellow hashers, a rule! Not tradition, not myth, not legend but a rule! Hence I get to write this, but suspect that the end of the world is nigh (forget Iraq).

On-On, Knob-Roy